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A Message for my Taco Bell Sauce Package


I’m sorry, Taco Bell Sauce Package, but I will not marry you.

I know we’ve been seeing a lot of eachother lately, and our time together has been…::sighs::…magical! But, the fact of the matter is that I’m seeing someone right now, and it’s pretty serious. You’ve always been there for me, but you have to stop hounding me like this.

I mean, it’s not like we ever were more than a fling anyways, right? I know sometimes I’d bring you home and sometimes I’d….eat out. :cough: BUT, it was JUST a fling. I don’t want you there everyday when I come home from work. I don’t want you there at breakfast. Hell, even a lunchtime nooner is a stretch. The fact of the matter is that you’re actually only really good when I’ve been drinking til two in the morning.

That’s just the way it has to be. Please learn to accept it.



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Third Base Politics is an Ohio-centric conservative blog that has been featured at Hot Air, National Review, Washington Post, Los Angeles Times, Pittsburgh Tribune-Review, and others.

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